Where Does the Time Go?

Week 79: San Francisco, CA

The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time
Any fool can do it
There aint nothing to it
Nobody knows how we got to
The top of the hill
But since we're on our way down
We might as well enjoy the ride...
--James Taylor

The passage of time. It's a real head trip, isn't it? It doesn't seem to go so fast, and then suddenly something happens to make you realize that, good Lord, it was a blink of the eye. I have been having this experience a lot this week. Monday, on my day off, I took Caltrain down to San Jose to visit my brother Alex and his family: my sister-in-law Patricia, nephew Ben, and my nieces Zoe and Isobel, who I introduced you to last week. The hour and a half train ride from San Francisco was relaxing and it was interesting to watch the little communities go by as we moved further into the suburbs--places with names like Redwood City, Menlo Park and Sunnyvale. Each train station had it's own unique depot, from streamlined 1950's art deco to old fashioned gingerbread buildings right out of "Hello, Dolly!."
It had been a number of years since I had visited my brother, who lives in the Silicon Valley because of his position at Apple, and that blow to the solar plexus one feels when one recognizes the passage of time hit me as we pulled into their driveway. Alex is a great guy, wonderful at his job, and a terrific father to his three kids. His hair is gray now and I recognize we have both gotten older (when did it happen?), but even more shocking was the little adults his three kids have become--well, Ben is far from little; at 16 years old and 6'5", he is a young man now. A talented musician, popular with his friends, and a water polo player and swimming coach. I definitely missed the growing up years of these fine kids, immersed as I was for so long in my life in New York, struggling to get my career going and cocooned within the relationship with my ex partner. It's hard not to have regrets. But my day with Alex and his kids-- hiking at a nearby park, taking photos of nature and enjoying the California sunshine--was so great that I felt that the passage of time had not taken away the feelings of appreciation and affection that I have for this wonderful family. When we return in September to play "Spamalot" in San Jose, I will get another good visit with them.

More blows to the solar plexus came this week as the world reeled from a series of celebrity deaths: Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, and most shocking, Michael Jackson. You know you are getting older when the icons of your youth are passing on. Michael Jackson, and what he represented for my generation, had nothing to do with bizarre antics, plastic surgeries and child molestation charges.
Michael was only 7 years older than I, and as a kid aspiring to show business, he and his brothers were a miracle to me. I watched their animated series on Saturday mornings, I collected their records. When I was in college, Michael broke out on his own with two magnificent albums, "Off the Wall" and "Thriller." He revolutionized the music industry by virtually creating what we now know as the music video. In short, as strange as he was, he was a brilliant artist and a part of our history. And of course, seeing him pass at the age of 50 just brings back that sense of awe about time. Where did it all go? On stage in "Spamalot" this Thursday, the day of Jackson's death, some of the performers added little touches of homage to their performances; the nun in the nun/monk pas de deux in the "Camelot" number exited doing the moonwalk, to great applause.

I have not done any sightseeing this week aside from my trip to San Jose, as I have been resting up for the busy Gay Pride weekend to come and finalizing plans for my apartment, car, etc. in Los Angeles, where we will be week after next. However, I did have the chance to speak to a group of adorable drama camp students at my friend Russell Blackwood's theatre here in San Francisco. Russell's company is called Thrillpeddlers, and they perform in a crazy barn of a space called the Hypnodrome.
Russ and I went to college together more than 25 years ago (again, where did it go?!), and he is an enormously talented man--he has directed everything from Shakespeare to opera, he is a fine actor, and he has a quirky, smart and outrageous sensibility which is reflected in his company's work. Thrillpeddlers presents classics of the Grand Guignol (a 19th century theatrical movement that was a precursor to what we now think of as the horror/thriller genre), and revive some of the most bizzare plays from fringe artists like Charles Ludlam and Charles Busch. I had such a nice time chatting with Russell's students about life in the business and life on the road--and as I sat there giving sage advice about 'the biz' to those open, young faces I thought, wasn't it just yesterday that I was that age? Hopeful, enthusiastic, with stars in my eyes? And then I realized, even with the passage of time, I still have that little kid inside. I hope I never lose him. As James Taylor advises, it's about enjoying the ride. We just need to make sure we keep our eyes open and don't miss all the special stuff along the way. Enjoy the moment, everyone.

Now the thing about time is that time
Isnt really real
Its just your point of view
How does it feel for you
Einstein said he could never understand it all
Planets spinning through space
The smile upon your face
Welcome to the human race...